Mission Driven Monday
This week, we continue our Mission Driven Monday series with a short thought to help you stay on mission this week.
Today, I want you to think about this quote:
“A lack of words is not a lack of insight.”
If you had met me when I was a kid and introduced yourself, chances are I might not have had much to say in return.
You might have thought I was boring.
Or sad.
Or dumb.
Or stuck up.
The reality is I was just shy.
You too? I thought I was the only one!
Seriously, though.
I didn’t say a whole lot, and that’s because conversations mostly happened inside my head. Now, before you jump to conclusions, I’ll go ahead and tell you that NO I was not hearing voices. My own thoughts simply paralyzed me. I wanted to say exactly the right thing, so as I child I often said nothing at all.
Nowadays, we would use a fancier word for a person like me: Have you ever heard the phrase “internal processor?”
A lack of words is not a lack of insight.
Some people need an extra minute (or more) for their brains to tell their mouths what to do. My own coping mechanisms include asking people lots of questions in return or simply telling them what’s going on inside my head by using phrases like:
“Hmmm…That’s a good point.”
“Let me think about that. I’ll get back to you (in five minutes, by the end of the day, tomorrow, etc.)
“We’re talking about a complex issue. I need to do a quick mental deep dive. Stay tuned.”
What do you do when you meet someone who is quieter than usual? Do you jump to conclusions about their mental acuity? This week, pay attention to the internal processors in the room. I can tell you from experience that we are fascinated by the “external processors” among us (In fact, I married one!) External processors often inspire the people around them to think about possibilities in new and dynamic ways. Plus, who doesn’t love a good conversationalist?
But to think before we speak need not be limited to the shy ones among us. Whenever you’re tempted to reply quickly, instead consider taking a beat to craft a thoughtful response. Your slow words might just be what the doctor ordered. When we think before we speak, we’re less likely to offend, more apt to choose diplomacy over divisiveness, and less likely to regret our words later. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve rushed to reply in an effort to “look smart,” only to have what I said backfire. Don’t be embarrassed about a lack of words. It is not a commentary on your character, but rather evidence of an active mind. We would do well to remember that we are not boring and dumb just because we don’t talk a lot; in fact, the opposite may be true! A world of possibility and creativity live inside your head. To ensure the public receives only the very best of you, consider your words.
And remember, body language goes a long way, too. When approached, smiling is never a bad idea. Even a woman of few words knows how to smile.
The smile that lights up the room also brings the temperature down. Which is a pretty cool trick.