In 1999, business partners Jennifer Fine and Jennifer Hamlin collaborated to create a line of dolls designed to take the world by storm. These career-forward icons of the doll world would topple Barbie on her pretty little head by re-imagining how girls play.
Girl power!
Achievement!
You can be anything!
Unless you’re Ashley the Attorney or Emily the Entrepreneur. These “smart friends for smart girls” captured the public’s attention for one brief moment at the turn of the century.
Game over.
Like 90% of new businesses, the company folded in 2001, a real tragedy considering the dolls were even featured as one of Oprah’s Favorite Things of 1999.
Ouch.
Being an entrepreneur is hard.
I should know.
A few years ago, I also launched a doll company with the goal of reimagining how kids play. Built on a foundation of generosity and friendship, our dolls honored kids with cancer and helped kids who care learn how to be better friends.
What we discovered, however, is that kids don’t need adults to tell them how to play with their toys.
They’re really awesome at doing that all by themselves!
Every mammalian kiddo across the planet engages in some form of play. Play helps animals discover their abilities and learn their limits, two skills crucial for both survival and success.
At a seminar I attended way back in 2001, parenting coach and author John Rosemond said, “Kids only need like three or four toys: a ball, some blocks, a few crayons, and a stack of books.”
Just three or four toys?
I couldn’t believe it!
And yet…
Think about all the the things you can do with just the toys I mentioned:
Let’s take the ball, for example:
Bounce it.
Throw it.
Catch it.
Carry it.
Roll it.
Pass it.
Pop it.
A ball can be used to play a game of kickball, baseball, tetherball, or 4-square.
And what little girl hasn’t stuffed a ball under her shirt, and shouted, “Look! I’m pregnant!” Who hasn’t used a giant ball as a makeshift seat or a tiny one as ammunition aimed at a younger sibling’s head?
Sure, Taylor the Teacher, Destiny the Doctor, and Jessica the Journalist arrived with some really cool accessories: miniature chalk, stethoscopes, and press passes, just to name a few. But while those things were cool (and teeny weeny), did they really inspire kids to be attorneys, doctors, and journalists?
I would venture that using math to perfect the ratio of dirt and water for a proper mud pie would be better preparation for a career in education. Following a stray ball into the woods and ending up with an angry case of poison ivy might ignite a passion for medicine. And staying up late into the night pouring out our feelings into a journal could be just the confidence-booster our kids need to realize a career in journalism.
The REALITY
Playthings don’t really prepare kids for the roles they will one day lead. Over and over again, psychologists point to toys such as balls, blocks, and books as the devices that do the real heavy lifting. In fact, scientists confirm that fewer toys actually help kids focus longer and play more creatively.
The smart lesson we should have all learned by now: A child doesn’t need to be told how to play, no more than a kitten needs instructions for pouncing on a string or a puppy needs his mama to show him how to catch a frisbee.
All animals instinctively know how to play.
We spend our lives playing because we spend our lives learning. It’s all one big “Choose Your Own Adventure” where anything can happen. What prepares us for our roles—whether we’re a homemaker or a hack saw operator—is the time we spend figuring out how to innovate, create, solve problems, work out solutions, make amends, and adapt—using whatever the heck is right in front of us.
We don’t need fancy stuff. We just need…STUFF.
But if Emily the Entrepreneur taught me one important lesson it’s that there’s no such thing as a “big break.” Just because you land on Oprah’s List of Favorite Things doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy a lifetime of success.
When the blocks fall down, rebuild.
When the ball rolls away, go after it.
When the crayons break, color gently.
And when the book ends, write a new story.
It’s true—90% of first-time businesses do fail. But you know what else is true? 90% of entrepreneurs who pick up the pieces and start again—SUCCEED.
The first game I ever played I played without any toys at all, and I bet you played it too. Remember the magical world of MAKE BELIEVE? Yes! That fantastical place where anything can happen and anything can be? You can go there right now. If you can dream it, you can do it.
If you are one of the 12.3 million female entrepreneurs in the United States today, my advice to you is this: Never stop playing.
You’ll figure it out.
And if at first you don’t succeed, you can always try again. Chances are good—next time, you’ll find your way.