March is Women’s History Month, and I would be remiss if a blog titled MISSION DRIVEN WOMAN didn’t dedicate at least one post to the inspiring females among us.
In 2019, I began this blog with a series of video conversations in which I interviewed more than 50 women. Some were friends of mine, but a lot of them were the result of me just asking,
“Hey, who do you know that I should know?”
The wisdom shared in these conversations cannot be underestimated. By the world’s standards, none of these women have platforms that would fill a colosseum or bank accounts that would make Oprah jealous.
And yet…
They are an enduring reminder of what happens when we get to choose the work that matters to us.
What follows are snippets from some of my favorite conversations. I hope you’ll read them and be inspired, too. As I sit here typing, I realize that I’m the one who needs these reminders more than ever.
At the end of each sound byte, I included a question to ponder.
Information is wonderful, but information without application is wasteful.
(You can click on the name to link directly to more helpful content about and from this woman leader.) And as always, feel free to reply directly to this email if you have a question or idea you’d like to share!
LET’S BEGIN!
On Contentment
Lydia has a smile as wide as the Nile. You would never guess at the heartbreak she’s known, but she channeled her own loss into generosity. When we talked about contentment, she said this: There’s one thing contentment is not: Contentment is not passive. It’s active and focused. Contentment is a deliberate intent to fill yourself up with love so you can embrace a vision of ways to give away more time, money, art, and love.
It’s a lesson on “How to be Generous” on steroids.
Our souls are not like vaults in a bank: empty, insulated, and locked. No vault can rival the human soul, which has an infinite capacity for forgiveness, love, and grace.
Question to Ponder: What are you holding onto that needs to be shared?
On Intentionality
Harnessing the power of the moments we have is the key to combating the curmudgeon living inside all of us. Ginny and I weren’t talking about the “carefully curated” moments we see plastered across our Instagram feeds. (Ginny’s not even on Instagram!)
We talked about the kind of real-life intentionality that leads to real powerful visceral responses.
So what does it mean to be a curator of memories?
The word curate comes from the Latin cura, which translates “to care for.”
When Ginny says she want to be a curator of memories, what she’s really saying is “I want to care for you.”
In caring for people, we’re not just manufacturing special moments; we’re literally making them feel special.
Question to ponder: What’s one unexpected thing you can do today to make someone in your life feel extra special?
On Identity
At the time of our conversation, Lauren’s husband was in law school, and Lauren had just had just given birth to their fourth child.
In Lauren’s words: “We are learning to live with less so that our future will include more.”
In the midst of what feels unfamiliar and scary, a lot of women cry, “I feel like I’m losing myself!”
Lauren didn’t express this sentiment because she isn’t losing herself at all; she’s leveraging the change to solidify her own identity. Isn’t it true that we define ourselves by what’s in our hearts, not by what’s on our business cards?
Question to ponder: What does your current business card say about you?
On Purpose
“GOD GAVE ME THE ABILITY TO RUN AND THE ABILITY TO UNDERSTAND THE HUMAN BODY. WHEN HE GAVE ME A CHILD WHO CAN’T DO THOSE THINGS, I DISCOVERED MY PURPOSE.”
I’m intrigued when I hear people talk about the work they do. For them, the “work” has nothing to do with what we commonly think of as “our job.”
Deanna has a daughter with Angelman’s syndrome, a rare genetic disorder that causes delayed development, problems with speech and balance, and intellectual disability. Deanna is using her training as a physical therapist to care for her daughter and her love of extreme sports to raise awareness and funds for the disease.
Unpaid work can be a springboard for the work you’re meant to do.
Questions to ponder: How do we plan and prepare for the lives we lead? Is purpose something we’re born with or something to be discovered? Can we find meaning in the circumstances that choose us?
On Fear
Jordan told me about how when she was a little girl she was afraid of so many things! And then one day she just decided to say yes—yes to an overseas missions trip with her dad. Getting on the plane and traveling to a faraway country with customs and language different from her own, she said “YES” and the experience changed the trajectory of her entire life!
Change is scary. Sometimes, I think we actually become more fearful as we get older. Maybe it’s because we can imagine all the ways in which something can go wrong. We know too much. Knowledge isn’t always power. Jordan, who is now in her late 20s, says she often has to remind herself how far she’s come. Saying “yes” opened her up to the possibility of new experiences.
“My life is more interesting, eclectic, and diverse than my high school aged brain ever imagined it would be.”
Question to ponder: What might you learn if you said yes to the thing you’ve been running from all these years?
On Choices
When a series of bad choices led to the end of a college dream, Bonnie Clark, didn’t allow herself to wallow in self-pity.
Sometimes, we make the wrong choice, suffer the consequences, and discover that the very next choice is the hardest one of all because we have to swallow our pride and accept the consequences. Looking at it from another perspective, however—that all other options have been eliminated—makes the next choice an easy one.
Bonnie reminds us to capture your thoughts, evaluate every decision, and remember: a choice is both a privilege and an opportunity. Don’t let the fear of making the wrong choice keep you from making a perfectly acceptable one.
On Hope
My friend, Ashley, lost her daughter to a terminal illness. She is the founder and CEO of an organization called Love not Lost in Atlanta. In talking with Ashley and others with similar stories, I discovered that there is a connection between the emotional moments that happen to us and the creative moments that we make happen.
These emotional moments sometimes manifest as interruptions, inconveniences, or gross injustices. But if we live each day in holy expectation, the moments become invitations to join God in the work of bringing more hope and love into the world.
Question to ponder: Have you ever had an interruption that turned into an invitation you couldn’t resist?
On Self Care
Melanie, who has published three (four?) books now, says that she often has to make time to fill herself up. All that stuff she pours out on the page didn’t come from nowhere. The words are the way she processes her lived experience, but she wouldn’t be able to share the hard stuff if she couldn’t also set aside time to create, dream, and just have fun.
Women are notorious for setting aside their own needs in service to everyone else’s.
Question to ponder: What’s something you’ve been wanting to do for fun that you’ve been putting off because you didn’t think you had the time?
On Success
Here’s what Jen had to say about success:
“I wanted to define success on my own terms…Success is doing work that’s meaningful and making meaningful connections, and building a life that I’m proud of everyday.”
The questions below are hers.
Questions to ponder:
“Am I living a life of integrity?
Am I stoking my creativity?
Am I showing up in a honest way that allows myself and others to be seen?
On Meditation
The secret to Karen’s contentment might surprise you: Karen starts the day by doing absolutely nothing.
She calls this meditation, and it’s definitely not doing nothing. Meditation is important work. When Karen first started meditating, she would set a timer for just two minutes. After years of practice, today she doesn’t need a timer at all and still spends up to thirty minutes every morning in silence. She told me that she imagines putting all her cares into a giant balloon and releasing them into the sky. Then she focuses on simply being grateful.
Question to ponder: What do you need to let go of?
On Decision-Making
Sandra shares that life is a series of baby steps, tiny decisions or actions we encounter on our way to something bigger. Ask God to help you prepare for the season that awaits. Pray, “God, give me guidance and direction. Please cast vision for what’s next, and show me what to do now, so I’ll be clear about where to go next.”
Question to ponder: What do you need to stay motivated during this season of waiting?
On Trauma:
Here’s a big idea: The gift of experience is grace for tomorrow.
No experience, however trivial or traumatic, is ever wasted.
Courtney emphasizes: Never think for one second that your trauma did not matter or matters only to you. While your experience is personal, the emotion surrounding it is universal.
Question to ponder: Have you ever felt like your trauma had to be experienced alone? Who needs to hear your story?
On Friendship:
Kristi is the founder of Signify, an organization that helps nonprofits and social enterprises get noticed and grow through effective marketing and communication. When I interviewed Kristi, she told me the one thing—the ONE thing—everyone needs is a mentor. Someone “a little farther along the path” knows exactly how to help you get to where you want to be. And the accountability cannot be minimized. It’s everything! (She was right! I have both a mentor and an accountability partner, and without their help, I’d be sitting on the sofa everyday watching soaps and eating bon bons—no kidding!)
Question to ponder: Who can you ask to be a part of your team?
I was going to insert an inspiring quote here because I’m sure Helen Keller or Maya Angelou said something worth writing down. To be sure, the contributions of women like Amelia Earhart and Marie Curie, are valuable. But there is something worth sharing inside each and every one of us. The purpose of this post was to elevate the ordinary voices who possess extraordinary wisdom.
And although he’s not a woman, Solomon, the wisest man in the Bible reminds us that, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
We need to lean into the relationships that are all around us.
May this blog be a place where you find the people and accountability you need to stay on track right where you are.